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Spring Awakening

A Letter From Liz

Hibernation is defined as a state of minimal activity and metabolic depression undergone by some animals, most commonly during the winter months. Since this is the first newsletter sent out since January, I guess you could say that I’ve been hibernating all winter and overslept through the first half of spring.

Yes, we have been here before. I was just apologizing in a December letter for a months long hiatus. At this point you must think I’m quite fickle. In the spirit of transparency, I will keep it 💯 with you. Maintaining the weekly communication cadence is challenging because I want to provide quality content that you find valuable.

Filming and editing videos, writing blog entries, and creating content is extremely time consuming. I was already falling behind by mid January. I even missed Forty Acres’ 5th birthday (January 20).

I was getting caught up (see our belated birthday Instagram post on February 8), when on February 11 I got the call that my older brother, Chuck, passed away.

Within two days I was home in upstate New York with my family. Although my official bereavement leave was through the first week of March, in all honesty I haven’t fully been present since returning to work.

Lately it takes a Herculean effort to get started on a task, much less complete it. Most days I muddle through, doing the bare minimum necessary to keep Forty Acres operating.

I typically have an idea for what I want to put out to the public and only want to release it when the vision is complete. Part of the reason, Forty Acres Fresh Market communications stopped is because there was a lot of content I had started to create but just could not finish. Procrastination has always been my Achilles heel and since my brother's passing it has often been easier to not do anything at all, resulting in Forty Acres Fresh Market going dark.

Resting in the doldrums is dangerous for a business. Thankfully, I have a dedicated team who has kept our services going during this time. However, I know I cannot stay in this state indefinitely. The business needs the work only I can do in order to keep growing.

Chuck was Forty Acres Fresh Market’s biggest fan. Every time we talked he’d want a business update. He even had his own Forty Acres Fresh Market t-shirt made. I could never tell him that Forty Acres is languishing due to my neglect, even if the cause for my dereliction of duties is understandable. So for his sake, if nothing else, I am pushing myself to navigate through what feels like an endless fog. While it is not as simple as willing myself to snap out of it, I do want (and need) to get back to being me, even while I don't feel like myself.

In recent weeks I have noticed that although my motivation is difficult to find, the accomplishment of completing a job does make me feel better. Little by little I have been finishing the work I started when Chuck was still here. I am not yet "okay," but something in me is once again starting to bloom.

I tell you all of this, not for sympathy or condolences, but to continue the open conversation we have had from the start. It is not fair for me to set an expectation for communication from Forty Acres Fresh Market and not offer an explanation for periods of dormancy. I thank you for your continued support through the silence.



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